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Sado-masochism is a paraphilia where a person requires either suffering or causing suffering in order to achieve sexual gratification. Typically one person in the couple suffers from sexual sadism (the need to harm) and the other person on the relationship has sexual masochism (desiring pain or humiliation). This arrangement may work out for couples since they are both getting what they want.
That being said, these types of behaviors are not considered psychologically healthy as evidenced by the fact that they appear in the DSM (the psychiatrist diagnostic manual) as disorders. Unfortunately there isn't a great deal of research as to what causes these problems and even less on how to treat them. Whatever caused your son's condition probably happened pre-adolescence and science isn't offering any easy cure. Given that he is an adult and not causing harm to anyone else (at least without their consent) there is little you can do in this situation. There is no medicine for this and it will be hit and miss finding a therapist that could help, providing your son even wants to see one.
Best of luck,
Dr. Williams
Monnica T. Williams, Ph.D., Clinical Psychology
No Cost OCD Treatment: http://www.ocdproject.org